Autism Negativity

This post is not intended to offend or judge any parent. This is solely my opinion and how I feel about being a parent of an autistic child. We consider ourselves very positive people. Always looking for the bright side and that is how we live our lives. When our son was regressing, it was so subtle and slow that at first we didn't notice and then I think denial set in. The diagnosis was almost a relief. Our fears were confirmed and we could now just focus on Kyran and helping him. I remember crying in the car on the way home from that appointment but then I was done. I was ready to help our boy.

Now life is not always easy with Kyran. He does need constant supervision, can't use the bathroom without us prompting him to go and there are tantrums. This morning he woke up crying which led to wanting me to hold him while he pulled my hair and scratched me...for an hour. All because he can't tell us what is wrong or what he needs. But he is an exceptional kid. Happy and smiling the majority of the time. Giving hugs and wanting to be close to us. He loves it when his sister's friends come over. As if the pretty girls came just to see him and spin him around. We ran into his preschool teacher the other night and she was so excited to see Kyran. She said the staff still talks about Kyran and how much they miss him now that he has moved into kindergarten. She told us that she talked his teacher and she gushed over Kyran. My point is Kyran may be one of the most charming non-verbal kids you will ever meet. He is loved beyond belief and it is reflected in his demeanor. We believe that our positive outlook and not worrying about what the general public think (i.e. stares over autistic behaviors) has had a positive impact on Kyran's personality. As I write, he is sitting next to me drinking my water and looking at a book with a big grin on his face humming to himself.

All of this is not to brag about how great my Autistic kid is or say that we are such exceptional parents that our son has a different sort of Autism. Not at all. We recently watched this video on You Tube and it quite possibly was one of the most depressing few minutes I have ever watched. While there were behavior similarities we noticed with Kyran and the kids in the video, it was the mothers that got to me. One mom has stated that her son will never get married and have a family. Her son looked about 3 years old. A bit early to give up grandchildren I think. I couldn't believe it when another mom said she actually thought about driving off a bridge with her daughter in the car as a solution better than the school she was to attend. While her daughter bounced around her she said the only reason she didn't was because of her other daughter. Oh. My. God. Autism Speaks, the producer of the documentary should be ashamed of themselves. Yes, they raise money for research but there have been reports about the integrity of the organization and how money is raised and distributed.

I understand the exhaustion, the frustration and how expensive it can be. But so much negativity has to affect the kids. They are Autistic and with that comes this ability to see, hear and observe without appearing to do so. When we think Kyran isn't paying attention he generally will surprise us. So to sit there and talk about how terrible their life is and how dismal a future this kid has is just awful. Would they dream of talking like that in front of typical kids? Never. Be careful of what you say in front of all little ears. They are listening and we believe it does affect them. We have high hopes for our beautiful son and we know he feels our encouragement and positive energy.